Monday, December 7, 2009

. . . some have stupid thrust upon them.

So I'm on the QT about the weekend. But I can recall for you that I dined with, and saw a play with, the Muleboy and the Jestaplero.

Fifteen minutes into the play, I realized that my trusts key lock [adhering the keys to me and m' belt] was unadorned with keys. I panicked, but in my mild-mannered way.

You see, I'm a strong advocate for, and proponent of,


The Club.

An anti-theft device for cars. Certainly not impenetrable, but one of the great deterrents and thief-slowers around.

I put mine on the car in Clevel
New Yo
the big foreign city. Not MY car, of course -- someone else's car.


I had but one key.

Wait; no I didn't. For I had NO keys. . . .


My car was hundreds of miles away.

the keys to my car were also on the lost keychain.

shit.

So I needed a locksmith, on the weekend, in a city far, far from home, while knowing that I'd need a locksmith close to home once I freed the Clubbed vehicle and drove it back to my stranded car.

A sad tale. One of confusion, anxiety, panic, anger, and loss.

But I offer a lesson. One you should take with you always.

It takes a Russian "locksmith" less time to grind/saw his way through The Club than it took for me to count the ample currency he got for liberating the car.

* sigh *

We swung through Little Italy on the way out of a botched vacation, picking up cannoli.

After all, it brought to mind that famous Italian "locksmith" who said: Leave the gun; take the cannoli.

4 comments:

Little Johnny Jewel said...

Yikes. Running out of petrol. Losing your keys. Trying the Phal (you tried the Phal again, didn't you?). Not seeing The Spunk Lads farewell show.
What a sequence of events...

Glad you could find somebody who could get you into your motor. Hopefully for less than the value of the car.

¡barangus!™ said...

He's driving a 1989 Cutlass.


Value?

It's a flippin priceless antique!

mister muleboy said...

He's driving a 1989 Cutlass.


Harrumph

He's driving a 1989 Cutlass Ciera!!


The subject Club vehicle was and is a Mini Cooper S.

The sparks that flew around the cabin were (I hear) . . . impressive!

Lupner said...

That is a very sad story indeed, but it was so well told that I'm almost glad it happened. Although it would have been infinitely better as fiction, of course. Is what I mean to say.

Thank God for cannoli.